


(I Guess) It would be nice.

by AetherBunny



Series: Everybody's Looking for Something [4]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Awkward Flirting, Awkward Sexual Situations, Crisis of Faith, Fluff and Angst, Forced Orgasm, Hand & Finger Kink, Happy Ending, Jealousy, Light Angst, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Non-Human Genitalia, Nonbinary Character, Other, Pet Names, Porn with Feelings, Possessive Behavior, Tentacles, Touch-Starved, Vaginal Fingering, Wings, history lesson, more feelings than porn, sort of snuggling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-26
Updated: 2019-08-26
Packaged: 2020-09-26 21:39:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20396563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AetherBunny/pseuds/AetherBunny
Summary: Gabriel had a plan. He knew he’d need to be a little firm to keep them on track. He didn’t expect it to turn out to be so difficult....“You know. This would go much better if you were enjoying yourself.”“I am.”“It’s hard to tell.” ... “You know you can participate. This isn’t like last time.”Gabriel and Beelzebub meet again, Gabe thinks he's going to get everything to go according to plan. We all know that's not going to happen.MUCH SOFTER than the last fic.  Part of a series, but it can be read on it's own.





	(I Guess) It would be nice.

**Author's Note:**

> The title is a dumb joke, since the fandom likes to associate the Beach Boy's Wouldn't it be Nice with the Ineffable Husbands. I thought the bureaucracy would be less enthusiastic... so I went with the opening line of George Michael's Faith... which is also nice and ironic...

_My way this time, don’t back out._

Gabriel responded to Beelzebub’s invitation. They met at another hotel in another part of the city and headed to another lush suite. No desk this time but there was an over-sized bed. It was clear what Beelzebub was hoping for. Gabriel had a plan. He knew he’d need to be a little firm to keep them on track. He didn’t expect it to turn out to be so difficult.

“Sit please.” He motioned to the edge of the bed and they sat awkwardly. “Your jacket?” He held his arm out and waited. Beelzebub narrowed their eyes, shrugged out of their blazer and draped it over his arm. “Thank you.” Gabriel disappeared for a moment to hang them properly.

“Do you know what I did last time, after you left?” He got no response, so he went on. “I took a shower. Like a human. I took a little nap. I tried to take a little nap. I closed my eyes and layed very still for a while, and thought about a lot of things. Then I went to the lobby and got a coffee. I didn’t like it, but I got one. I think it’s an acquired taste even among humans. But that’s not the point. The point is why I did these things.” He gestured to his companion and waited for a response. 

“Why?”

“I have no idea. I don’t have any idea why I did those things.”

“Zzzo why do I have to hear about them?”

“Because even though I had no idea why I did any of that. I sort of liked it. ‘I got out of my comfort zone’ and did some new things.”

“Are you going to make any kind of point?” 

“Yes! I’m getting there! Okay I guess the point is. Today, you’re going to get out of your comfort zone and try some new things. I think they’re going to be new to you. I don’t really know.”

“Oh. Goody.”

“C’mon now. I gave that nice pep talk!”

“That was a pep talk? I can give better pep talkzz.”

“Just trust me, okay?”

“Fine.”

“Great! Hang on!” He went to lean against the dresser to take off his shoes. Sock-clad he knelt to remove the Prince’s shoes as well. They watched with an increasingly skeptical look on their face.

“You call these socks?” He asked holding their small nearly bare foot through the fishnet socks they were wearing. They frowned at him. Gabriel inched closer still on his knees. He wrapped his arms around them where they were sitting on the bed. He got a curious head tilt, but nothing more. From there he had to pause.

“You know. This would go much better if you were enjoying yourself.”

“I am.” 

“It’s hard to tell.” He scooted them a little bit towards him, so he was bracketed by their legs. “You know you can participate. This isn’t like last time.” Beelzebub tentatively rested their hands on his shoulders. One of them slid upwards to stroke a thumb behind his ear.

“There you go. Not so bad is it?”

“Juzzt Zuspicious.” They replied even as they scratched gently at the back of his neck.

“Of what?”

“You’re awfully… zzzoft.”

“It seems out of character for me right? Well last time it was a roller coaster, and not that I don’t like roller coasters; they were one of ours you know. I just thought this time it could be like, I don’t know those little swan paddle boats.” He shrugged. Beelzebub ever-so-gently placed their hands on the sides of his face, and made the eye contact they had subtly been avoiding until that moment.

“You’re an idiot.”

“Is this about the roller coasters? I can prove it come here.” With that he scooped up Beelzebub, before they could react, and moved to deposit them further up the bed. He stretched out and half pinned them down. He propped himself on his elbows over their stomach and rested his chin on his hands. “One could argue they started with the Russian Ice slides, but the thing we think of as a modern roller coaster was invented in the 1800s by a man named LaMarcus Thomson. He got the idea from watching people ride an old coal mine train. He thought an open air family activity would keep people from engaging in other more immoral pastimes. Drinking, gambling, brothels, you know.”

“And?”

“And he may have had a conversation with a mysterious man at a train station that helped him put the ideas together.” Gabriel beamed.

“_You_ invented roller coasters?”

“Thomson did, but I helped.” He nodded.

“Oh, well then Azzzzmodeus is a big fan of your work.” Beelzebub patted his cheek.

“What do you mean?”

“He keeps a gigantic lizzzt of everything labeled an aphrodizzzziac. Not too long ago he wazz all about roller coasters.”

“Really? Uhg. I thought they were still working.” He let himself slump gently forwards to put his face in the crook of their neck. “How are Corn Flakes holding up? Wait, never mind.”

“Weren’t we zzzpozed to be fooling around?” They scratched through Gabriel’s hair.

“Roller coaster, swan boat.” He gestured between them with one hand, not lifting his head.

“You would be a szzwan. Pretty and petty- dammit.”

“YOU! Just called me pretty!” He snapped his head up.

“Gabriel.” Beelzebub sighed.

“No, you can’t deny it! You’ve said it! You think I’m pretty! I’m literally _never_ going to let you forget that. But I won’t tell anybody. I’m going to keep it all to myself.”

“Thank fuck.”

“Oh we’ll get there.” He gave his very best wolfish grin. It was maybe wolfish for an angel, Beelzebub had seen better, but it was the thought that counted. He leaned down for a kiss half expecting to be stopped. He paused waiting for resistance and none came so he closed the small gap. Beelzebub kissed back and even brought their hands back to his face. But it wasn’t until he slid a hand up their blouse that he got an audible reaction. The small gasp was very encouraging and he worked at the buttons. He knew from the time they swapped bodies they seemed to prefer to keep their body neutral.

Angelic and by extension demonic bodies were made “blank” but malleable. With a little thought and effort they could decide how to present. Remaining unchanged wasn’t unusual, plenty of angels, Michael included, preferred themselves that way. So he wasn’t surprised to find an empty chest. He could still cover it in kisses until Beelzebub got impatient and decided they wanted to make out more.

“What do you want down there?” They asked against his mouth.

“What do YOU want down there. I’m flexible. Pick what you’d like and I’ll work with it.” He leaned in for another series of kisses.

“What if I don’t want anything down there?” They made him pause with a hand to his mouth.

“Then I’m going to keep kissing you and maybe some sweet talking until you can’t stand me and go back to hell. If that’s five minutes or three days, I don’t care.” He pulled back to kneel over them. “I’ve got all the time in the world your Highness.” He teased as he unbuttoned his shirt. “You like to pretend you’re such a wicked little thing but you’re really just _starved_ for affection.” He went to undo their slacks. “Nobody does affection like an angel. Do you want me to _glow_ for you _sugar_?” Now shirtless it was easier to see the faint golden light he was emitting.

“Enough!” They groaned and within seconds of being properly stripped there was a large ink black tentacle where human genitalia usually went. He leaned back slightly in surprise. They huffed.

“Give me a second! This is not what I had anticipated!” He pointed and it reached out and wrapped around his hand. “Hm.” He curled his wrist into it and leaned downward to press a kiss to the glossy surface. In the blink of an eye it was gone. “HEY!” He looked up and Beelzebub had an arm thrown over their eyes.

“Do you really want to do this? We don’t have to? I won’t even come up there for sweet nothings. You can possess me again and we can -”

“No!” They barked, and then added quieter. “No, I want -”

“I’m going to come up there and be all soft then.” Beelzebub didn’t say anything to stop him. So he slid up the bed beside them and wrapped his arms around them. They struggled not unlike a cat who does not want to participate in any forms of affection being foisted upon them. So Gabriel opened his arms. They stopped struggling but didn’t move away.

“If I call you cute will you discorperate me?”

“Yezz.” They mumbled into his neck.

“Okay, can I say that I accidentally think I sort of like you?”

“NO.”

“I won’t then.” They mumbled something else incoherent into his shoulder in response. “Could you repeat that?” He pulled away and they tried to move with him, but he stopped them from snuggling in any further.

“I liked it better when you were an azzzhole.”

“Yeah, well me too. It’s what we get for messing around like this I guess. Angels are hardwired for love.”

“Ugh.” They rolled away to put their back to him.

“Hey. I’m not saying I love you. I’m saying we have a predisposition to be affectionate. It might not seem like it but it’s deep down in all of us someplace. It’s like my switch has been flipped and I don’t think I can flip it back. The other angels have been looking at me funny. I’m afraid they’ll catch on. I nearly hugged Michael the other day.” 

“Your reputation will never recover.” 

“Probably not. I could try the old loving all her creations line.” Gabriel rolled to spoon them, Beelzebub gave a little snort. “Don’t pretend you don’t like this. Nothing is keeping you here on the bed.” He smiled and kissed the back of their neck. “I think maybe you might even like me too. You keep agreeing to meet me after all.” He slid an arm under the crook of their neck to bring them closer.

“Becuzz you were a feather-brained bastard.”

“Hmmm.” He hummed and pressed more kisses to their neck and shoulders. He was starting to catch on to the idea that they might have a thing for his hands so he let them wander. He stroked their thighs, throat, chest... Beelzebub wasn’t exactly ticklish, but if his touch was light enough they’d shiver against him. He wondered what it would take to get them to make some noise.

Just when he thought he might try to get face to face again they took him by surprise. They found one of his hands and guided it gently down between their legs.

“This isn’t what I expected.” He said as he discovered the slick heat of their newly created sex.

“And I thought you were going to tie me up and make me beg for mercy.” They curled their hand pressing his fingers into them.

“Not really my scene. Try Sandalphon, glutton for punishment that one.” Getting their point he moved their hand and stroked a curious finger through their folds.

“Never, ah-!” They arched against him.

“Good I really don’t think I like that idea. I mean. You’re a being with free will, but the thought of it is making me a little jealous. Fuck, you’re wet.” He circled their clit with his thumb, and teased their entrance.

“Is it everyone or just other angels?” They tried to grind into his touch but he flattened a hand over their hip to hold them still. 

“A little of both I think, but definitely not other angels, I don’t like that at all.” 

“I’ll do my best to -” Without any further warning he slipped his fingers inside. Beelzebub cut themselves off with a shocked exhale. 

“What were you saying?” Gabriel asked against their ear as he curled his fingers searching for that particular bundle of nerves. It didn’t take long, a sharp yelp let him know when he found his target.

“That’s it.” He coaxed, rubbing slowly against it. He brought his thumb back to their clit. “That’s it.” They sighed, and at last he let them rock into his touch. They were still frustratingly quiet, but it was easier now to tell they were having a good time. His hand was soaked, and they were panting. Maybe one time he’d make it out of one of their little encounters without getting dirty.

“Hurry up.” They moaned and he shook his head.

“No I think I like it just like this.” With his free hand he re positioned their leg draped back over his, keeping them open and making it harder for them to set their own pace.

“Fuck you.”

“Tisk tisk.” He slid his fingers out. “That’s not how you ask nicely.”

“Fuck me then.” Already they were wriggling to face him.

“Okay okay.” So much for being firm and sticking to his plan. Between the two of them getting in each other’s way they eventually got Gabriel’s pants off. “You _are_ starved for this aren’t you?”

“Fine, yess please. Just fuck me.” He pulled their leg back up over his hip. Tossing the plan out the window was worth it for their deeply satisfied groan as he lined up and sank into them. Immediately their arms were around him pulling him down for a biting, desperate kiss. He started with slow shallow thrusts just to further irritate them. He only picked up the pace when he felt the sting of their nails at his shoulder blades. They _could_ go at it for hours, and as much as he joked about it he wasn’t actually keen on seeing how long they’d tolerate him.

“Maybe I could just- oh – come visit you in hell once in a while for ah - “

“Absolutely not! If any other demon so much as looked at you twice I’d have their head on a pike outside my office. You’re mine.” They gripped his throat keeping their thumb under his chin forcing his head upwards. He shuddered, not sure what part of that made him feel all sorts of delicious new feelings. They’d have to explore that later on.

“If you insist your Highness.” Then he got an idea, a good idea. It was a skill he hadn’t used in centuries, but it was like riding a bike. “Hold on a sec. Hold on.” Beelzebub was not happy they had stopped but he was sure it was going to be worth it. He pulled out and rearranged himself to be propped against the headboard. ‘Come here.” They didn’t need to be told twice. Within moments he was deep inside them again. “That was a neat trick of yours last time, are you ready for one of mine? Just keep going, it’s gonna take a second. Beelzebub ground down against him and it was a momentary distraction. “Okay ready? Hang on.” When they pointedly did not take his advice he made sure to brace them. He was used to using this particular skill from a nice quiet office room, it took him a second to focus. He had to make this good. He rolled his hips a few times pumping into them waiting for just the right build up. Beelzebub had just relaxed into the rhythm again. And then there it was. _Divine Ecstasy_.

“_Holy_ shi-” their body went rigid, arched backwards in his arms. Gabriel laughed himself breathless as he came along with them.

“Oh but you’re not human are you Bee? I think you could take a little more? Don’t you?” He focused a little more despite his own haze, and dialed the sensation up. Their body jerked and he watched their eyes gloss black. Their grip on his biceps tightened enough to break skin but he wasn’t worried. “Beautiful. Absolute perfection.” He kissed their neck and shoulders and eventually their mouth as they came down from their high. “Never done that up close before. Never done that _with_ anybody. You good?” They just looked at him wide eyed and a little dazed. He laughed again, and gently uncoupled them. “I’m gonna get a washcloth -” they were clean before he could even get out of bed. “Oh thanks.” He settled back down, unsure of where their encounter was going to go from there. He’d like a little cuddling if he were to be honest. “You wanna maybe?” He slouched himself down on the pillows and opened his arms. They nodded. “Good. Come here.”

“Hmmm.” They stretched and completely ignored the pillows in favor of his chest. It took them a minute or two to get comfortable but they wound up mostly perpendicular to him. Gabriel figured he wouldn’t be going anywhere any time soon, so he might as well get a little more comfortable. He just closed his eyes and … He slept. He actually slept. Not long, he figured for a couple of hours, but that was the longest he had EVER slept. He didn’t regret it, especially after he figured out what woke him. Beelzebub’s proprietary drape across his chest had spread. A dusty sort of gray-brown set of wings had emerged sometime while they had slept. Head tucked in their arms, wings out, they reminded him for half a second of the little cherubs renaissance painters liked to put in the corners of their canvases. What a sweet little angel he was sure they were. He wondered if they had known each other _before_. _If they had done this before._ He decided not to dwell on those thoughts. Instead he went back to admiring their wings. He knew he should be able to recognize them, but he just couldn’t place where he had seen the pattern. He tentatively stroked at the base of one of them and was rewarded with a startlingly cute stretch from the body they were attached to. They settled and he stroked the wing again.

“Mourning Dove.” They mumbled and rubbed the sleep from their eyes.

“Hello sugar, but it’s evening now I think?”

“They’re _Mourning Dove_.” He got a little clearer response. “I can conjure the bug wings. These are mine.”

“I like them, they suit you. Do you want to see mine?” They gave a noncommittal little shrug. “Here sit up.” They were much less than helpful and he wound up with them laying in his lap. “They’re not actually swan if you can believe it.” He flexed and pulled them from the ether. Much like his wardrobe they were a soft Grey. Also like his wardrobe the only bit of color was a band of dark pink along the covert feathers at the inside top. “Galah, they’re a parrot.” He raised his arms out along side them. The gold markings that appeared on the insides of his arms matched roughly to the pink shapes on his wings. “It’s all so nicely coordinated.” He stretched his wings and folded them against his back. “Look I’ve been thinking about this. All of this. About the lack of Apocalypse, about Aziraphale and Crowley. Us. I think they were right...war wasn’t the plan. I know it’s not for me to know. But I have an idea. See I think if what we are doing was truly forbidden, we wouldn’t be able to do it. It’s different for humans, they weren’t made the same way we were. If it were really wrong, Aziraphale should have fallen thousands of years ago. I think she wants balance. She WANTS us to get along.” He didn’t really know how to say what he wanted to say.

“Why?”

“Well, I don’t know how much time you’ve spent on earth. But I’ve come to learn very recently that people don’t really NEED to be tempted anymore. For good or evil. They can handle both themselves. I think there are ways we can work together to even them out? I’m not sure. It sounds crazy when I say it out loud. I’ve just been thinking a lot.” In his lap Beelzebub tilted their head. “I don’t know. Never mind. Forget I said it.”

“Sorry,” they offered very very quietly. “Sorry I-” They shook their head and shrugged.

“Oh, no. Don’t be, it’s not you. It wasn’t you. I think I was long past due for a crisis of faith honestly. It’s sort of comforting to not have it alone.” He cupped their cheek and they brought a hand up to cover his. “Hey. Ah, I was thinking about maybe getting a little apartment somewhere. I’m not sure where yet. I feel like it could be practical. I can um. I can let you know where it is when I decide. If you want.” He got no response. “I mean if you need a nap or five minutes of peace and quiet or something. I won’t be able to keep you out. But you’d be welcome.” Beelzebub fiddled with one of their wingtips and didn’t meet his eyes, but they nodded. “Great!” He leaned down for a kiss and got a mouth full of feathers for his troubles.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm ace, this was hard. But the fandom has been so wonderfully responsive I wanted to continue this story. I snuck a few headcanons in there, wings and ineffable plans and such... 
> 
> There will be one more, two-chapter fic to close off this series. It's gonna get goofy and sweet again so there's that. I've got a lot of BS hospital stuff to get through soon, but then I have days off of work to write.
> 
> You can now visit me on a sideblog on tumblr as Aetherbunny of course. I'm still sort of setting it up and deciding how I want to maintain it. But feel free to say hello! or ask questions or perhaps buy me a kof fi if you know what I mean?


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